Synonyms for Grief
by Lucy Murrell
Art by Rachel Mulder
Fear
Distance
A perverse sense of clarity
A perverse sense of joy
Cosmic discomfort
An eerie kind of comfort
Immense fear
A subtle but prevailing sadness
General confusion
Specific confusion
Bodily emptiness
Raw throats, red noses, split lips
A consuming pain that feels, at times, like great hunger
Absence
An invisible abscess,
Loss that feels, at times, like failure
Nights busy with thought
Persistent distraught
Tears on cheeks and dried around the eyes
Fear of something like fate or prophecy
Fear of something like heredity or similarity
Understanding
Fear of understanding
A tickling sort of discomfort
Tears of joy at Passover
The need to hold my mother tightly
A thing I have in common with my Uncle
The urge to talk to trees
A fantastic swell of love
A sorrowful feeling of disconnect from the trees
A spot saved at the wedding
The need to notice yellow butterflies
The question why
Fear of headaches
An unbearable need to sleep
A distaste for new media
Anger
A vague impression of potential
A capacity for tremendous growth
Darkness
Light
Handwritten letters sent to five different states
Peace in nature
Bliss
Rachel Mulder, Gossip, cyanotype
